DR. DUM ARCHIVES - April 2004 QUESTION 04.12.04 If God is omnipotent, then he would be able to imagine an entity greater than he. How can you improve perfection? If this idea were to hypothetically pop into his mind, then *hypothetically* the universe would come to an abrupt halt(I read it in an encyclopedia). He therefor must not be omnipotent. -poop4breakfast ANSWER Good point. This follows with St. Anselm's Ontological argument. He proved that God existed by using logic, which is faulty at best. You can prove that I am a frog through logic just as well. Anselm said: 1. Imagine a being so damn powerful nothing is greater than it. 2. Anything you can think of can exist in reality or have already existed. 3. If this great thing you think of really existed, then it would be greater than what you thought of. Therefore, God has to exist because points 2 and 3 create a contradiction. Let us now prove that I am a frog. 1. Frogs breathe air. 2. Frogs have eyes, legs, a nose, a tongue blah blah blah. 3. Dr. DUM breathes air. 4. Dr. DUM also has eyes, legs, a nose, a tongue and blah blah blah. Therefore, Dr. DUM is a frog. Cool huh? Logic is faulty and therefore God doesn't exist. Plus, why would he want anyone bad mouthing him? The only people that believe in him are crazies who don't think for themselves anyway. I'll get off my soapbox now. QUESTION 04.12.04 I have several questions: 1. Why isn't the word 'gullible' in the dictionary? 2. Are children who use sign language allowed to talk with their mouth full? 3.Do you ever notice those red balls on the wires while your driving? Well what are they for? 4.Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours soaking wet and bawling for food? -Jack ANSWER To answer your questions: 1. You never know. 2. Eww, god no! 3. Yes, you should go ahead and tell your friends about www.dumweb.com. QUESTION 04.12.04 In fasting and clensing for colonoscopy, the menu includes clear liquid diet....does this include beer with my chicken broth...it is a clear liquid like gingerale? -Mike ANSWER If they told you clear liquid and chicken broth to be the same thing, well then. I would stick to light beer then because it's more clear than regular. QUESTION 04.12.04 If you could live in any fairy tale which one would it be???? -Anonymous ANSWER The Russian fairy tale about the old witch with a house that has chicken legs. They could feed the entire village! QUESTION 04.12.04 What is the purpose of male nipples? -Nick ANSWER For piercing. QUESTION 04.12.04 How do you know if a boy really likes you? -Lisa ANSWER If you've got a rack, whether it be decent sized or not, he'll try to cop a feel when you're making out. That's how you can tell that a boy will never really love you for more than your body. QUESTION 04.12.04 Who cleans heaven's toilets? -muriel ANSWER There is no heaven. QUESTION 04.12.04 What does DUM stand for and why do I have a teacher without the first part Mr. and he has Dr. instead and he isn't a doctor like you's but your not real doctors are you ? -Cassie ANSWER English much? QUESTION 04.12.04 according to the current calender what was the year that christ was born and died? i understand ad and bc but not the years during his life. -Mike ANSWER Actually, they don't use BC and AD anymore. BC has become B.C.E. which stands for Before Common Era and C.E. which stands for Common Era. QUESTION 04.12.04 what do jackalopes eat and where do they live? -Michele Potts ANSWER They live in Neverland and eat the children that want to grow up. QUESTION 04.12.04 what is the surgeon generals job -jase ANSWER To come up with warnings for things that will give you cancer. QUESTION 04.12.04 there are 2 cats, one likes tuna and the other likes salmon, what is the name of the cat that likes tuna? Answer : One the one that like salmon is called "the other" -Anonymous ANSWER Thanks for doing my job for me you slut. Now what am I supposed to do since you've answered the question for me? Archives Copyright ©2008 www.dumweb.com, All Rights Reserved